SOMEONE GET THIS THE FUCK OUT OF OUR WAREHOUSE!!!!  We've tried throwing it away, burying it, tossing it in a river...  NOTHING WORKS!!!  Despirate for answers, we called Miss Cleo hoping her free reading would be the answer to our prayers, only to find out that the curse attached to the object requires the current owner to sell the piece FOR 666 FUCKING DOLLARS!!!!   WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK??!?!?!  That's a real fucking problem, because this thing isn't worth SHIT!!!  Sure, it's old as hell and in its original packaging, BUT WHO THE FUCK CARES?!?!  IT SUCKS!